I Cabbage Patch Early and Often

Everyday when I awake, I usually use the bathroom and then get back in bed just to remember what it feels like to be comfortable and at rest before I am rattled into reality, or my perception of what is my existence. Then, I cabbage patch. When thats over, I continue with whatever it is I am doing, or I merely cabbage my way through the rest of the morning, and sometimes into the late hours of the evening. Then I cabbage patch again. I guess it all depends on how that pale green, round, leafed vegetable stands up to the daily rigor of my routine shafty activities. Taking all of this into consideration, and other things I have yet brought to light, the true essence of the cabbage patch must be revealed. In this essay, I will try to translate what the cabbage patch means to me and the rest of us who cabbage regularly.

First, the cabbage must be carefully selected and admired in that sequence, and then it's onto the real patching which involves a myriad of rafty variables which could just jump up and bite you on your unsuspecting ass if you're not paying attention. And that matter would then be the patch itself. Naturally, it would then follow that when you enter the patch you usually don't know what is going on and sometimes you don't even want to know what is going on. Raft happens... I think we all know where this is headed.

Second, the cabbage must be addressed as a separate entity from the collective term which by its unplanned yet innate nature combines the rubbery green vege-ball of life with the patch which we will see as the forest in that old "see the forest from the trees" analogy. The patch exists only as an inevitable and observable response to the energy of all of the individual cabbages we deal with regularly. Yes, all of us must be a part of this synthesized cabbage patching as long as we exist as ardent individuals with no fear of patching our way through life and the hereafter. The cabbage is real. CPSR!

Third, and last, we all well know the meaning of the C.P., but do we dare take a gander at the last two initials of this fabled war cry? S.R. stands for whatever you think it means. A lot of people have their ideas. Some think it stands for Strained Rotation. What the hell? Cabbage Patch Strained Rotation!? What does that mean? My friend was sure it meant Served Regularly. Cabbage Patch Served Regularly. Now that makes more sense, but unfortunately it is way off the mark. Only the people truly in the know really understand what CPSR stands for. And it is to them that I say, "I love you guys, CPSR forever!".

please check:
http://www.niallkennedy.com/blog/uploads/cabbagepatch.mp3

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=cabbage+patch